Merry Christmas!

This blog is about enjoying the true Christmas Spirit during this time of year. The following paragraphs are reprinted from one year ago. My apologies for the repeat, but I have a good excuse (aren’t they all?). Steve and I are moving from Galveston to Houston this week. Although is only a cross-town move, there is just as much to be done as a cross-country move might necessitate. Are we crazy to be doing this at this time of year? Only a little bit. The reality is that I was prepared for the season ahead of time, thanks to having to send packages off early since they were going to the other side of the world. Decorating has not been a big issue for us in recent years and baking never was (except for the annual day-long cookie baking and decorating extravaganza that our daughters enjoyed while living at home.)

If you feel a need to take a short break and refocus before the week really gets under full swing, I hope you enjoy this blog that was originally printed on December 20, 2010 (edited today for time correction).

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No matter what religious holiday you are observing this time of year, you are most likely focusing on joy, love, understanding and forgiveness. ‘Tis the Season to be smiling and laughing and giving others the benefit of the doubt, especially as we look forward to a new year and all the ramifications of placing the 2011 calendar in the pile of mementos. Why, then, am I hearing stories of rude behavior and lack of social graces? Shouldn’t everyone be stepping aside in the crowded malls to let others pass by? Aren’t we all talking and laughing while waiting in the long lines at the Post Office and then having a good and humorous chat with the clerk behind the counter? NO?

I propose that we each have more control over our holiday experiences than we think. Here are a few tips to increase your Holiday Spirit. First and foremost, that old word repeated so often on this blog site – focus. Have you lost sight of the real focus of this season? Are you stressing over sending the Christmas cards off, buying the last minute and hard-to-find gift and placing decorations just so? Is there more baking to be done than there are mouths to enjoy it? Are you giving in to the television commercials that sing “Deck Your Halls with Glitz and Glamor, Never Mind the bills that will come due…” (sung to the tune of Deck the Halls) or believing the store windows that cheerily repeat “Your credit is sorely lacking, but my dear you’d best get wrapping. As long as you’re at the mall, Buy me Now, Buy me Now, Buy me NOW!” (sung to the tune of Let it Snow). If you are feeling more stressed than usual for this holiday, stop for just a moment and focus on the things that really matter to you. Your family and friends will be happy to get a phone call or e-card. Guests at your party will notice the warmth and comfort of your home, no matter how glitzed it may be. Sharing a simple meal with those you love is the best gift of all.

If you feel there is still a long list that simply must get done, take a second right now to put a reminder on your calendar for October 2012. Include a list of all you want to do next year, how much time and money it will take and dates for finishing up each item. While you are at it, write a note about how you are feeling about now as a reminder that time gets away and real life does not stop just because we have loaded a complete full-time job of holiday preparation onto our full schedules.

Second, do the TAB exercise that ELAN graduates are familiar with. TAB – Thought Attitude Behavior. How is your behavior lately? Are you pleasant and fun to be around or are people calling you Scrooge under their breath? The TAB exercise recognizes that our behavior is driven by our attitude which is a reflection of our thought. The very good (and sobering) news is that we have complete control over our thoughts. Good because it is a simple (may not be easy) thing to change our thoughts. It takes recognition of a need for change and intention to catch us in the act of a wayward idea to be able to then change direction. Sobering because we can no longer blame others for our lousy attitudes (I hate when that happens). Our thoughts can start us on a downward spiral but only we can change direction and begin to spiral upward. If you are grumpy in anticipation of a holiday event – check your thought that is driving your poor attitude. Chances are, that thought is faulty and needs an upgrade. Even if you don’t think it is, practice “fake it ’til you make it’ and pretend to have a better attitude based on a new thought – see what happens at the event.

Third, do some reflecting. Dig a little deeper to figure out why your thoughts (beliefs) are what they are. We set up a complicated system of ideas based on our past experiences. Like it or not, we all have prejudices – preconceived ideas of situations, places, people and even groups of people based on what we have been told (and decided to believe) and the experiences we have had (as we choose to remember them). Unfortunately, sometimes those prejudices turn into racism – or any kind of ism that lumps all people of one color, race, ethnic or economic group or sexual orientation into our neat categories. We believe that if one blank acted blank then all such blanks will always act the same way.  Can you see the error of that thinking? Take a moment and think about how people may preconceive ideas about you based on what they might assume based on your appearance alone – It is not fair, is it?

When we transfer our preconceived thoughts (prejudices) on to all situations, we set up expectations of an outcome. We really do see the world through our personal lens, noticing only that which matches neatly. When we do this with types of people or particular people that we hold certain attitudes toward, we only notice that which supports or agrees with our preconceived idea of that person.

The fact is, it takes energy to approach each situation as a new one with no expectations. It is so much easier to float along on our old and comfortable expectations. Once we step down one path it takes even more energy to turn around and seek a new one. If you find yourself in a less than joyous encounter, stop and think about your own behavior – is it driving the atmosphere? Can you change your attitude by clarifying and perhaps correcting your thought that set the tone?

I’ll give an example. I overheard a disturbing conversation recently about a rude encounter someone had with a government employee. Those engaged in this conversation were mentioning, as a matter of fact, that they were not surprised the employee was a member of a certain race. I have to wonder how this person approached said situation if they in fact had such a preconceived notion of all people of that race. Can you follow my thought? Let’s say you hate purple cars but you have never taken time to determine why you hate purple cars. You merely consider it a fact of you – it is part of your identification that you hold so dear. What kind of day are you going to have when you see a purple car on the freeway? Is your blood pressure going to go up? Are you going to subconsciously begin to think your day is going downhill? If so, will it?

Of course! We are so much more powerful than we imagine. Subtle hints to our subconscious yield huge dividends. Don’t believe me? Try this experiment this week – especially if you will be out and about and dealing with frazzled and harried shoppers and workers. Approach every encounter with joy – as if you expect nothing less than smiles and generous conversation from each person. Leave your prejudices at home (yes, you have them -what are they?). Assume the best for everyone and greet each person with a sincere and heartfelt “Hello, How are YOU?” If you are brave enough to look the clerk, waitress, bank teller or drive-through operator in the eye when you say it, you might be surprised at the warm reception you will get – regardless of that person’s specifics or your preconceived notion of those specifics. Try it for one week – especially this Christmas week – and see what happens. Imagine having a life filled with pleasant encounters from all walks of life – such an experience is completely within your grasp. This is one simple activity that is easy and returns a thousand fold.

This week, approach all people with an attitude of acceptance, understanding and generosity and see what happens. The vibes you send out come back to you. If people are acting rudely toward you, think about how you are acting toward them. Even if you get off on a bad start, you have the power to change the direction of a spiral from downward to upward. Simple, not always easy.

As for me, I am focusing this Christmas season on the joy and peace I have in my life because of a loving God who created and loves me exactly as I am, a comforting Holy Spirit that is close as my two hands folded in prayer and a saving Son who walked this earth as a perfect man and sits in the Kingdom of Heaven. I am thankful for so much that I lack nothing and although I sorely miss our daughters and their families my heart is full of the love I feel for all of them and they for me. I look forward to time with family and friends sharing new traditions that have little to do with glitz, glamor or outrageous giving.

Merry Christmas!

“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:11

“It is never too late to give up your prejudices.”  Henry David Thoreau, 1817-1862

“Eracism”  Slogan from a 1990s bumper sticker

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One Little Word

Last week we talked about “Two Little Letters” and this is a continuation of that thought. One little word. My dad told me a story once of how one little word made a national shampoo company millions. The word? Repeat. Think about it. By adding the word repeat to the instructions they were encouraging consumers to use twice as much of their product each day and thereby increasing their sales (and profit). I don’t know the truth of that story – it may have just been a way for my dad to illustrate how we should think about things before blindly following instructions from someone who may have a motive other than our own welfare in mind (it worked and Dad, you might want to chime in here by clicking the comment button below). It may be why I wash by hand my clothes that say “Dry Clean Only” in guess what? Woolite? Nope. Baby Shampoo. It is just as gentle as the brand they tell us we MUST use to save our clothes, smells really good and has no harmful chemicals like dry cleaning. I am happy to report that so far my clothes have held together very well without fading – although the neatly pressed look is lacking.

Now that I’ve raised your skepticism let me offer some words of truth – no kidding. That one little word has great power in our lives whether we realize it or not. Do you have a word or phrase that you find yourself repeating? Like any habit, we latch on to words (thoughts) that are comfortable to us. Words (and thoughts) that have served us well because they always prove to be true. We may not be happy with the truth the words tell us but we are familiar with that truth and therefore are very hesitant to change or veer away. Last week I gave a presentation to CAP members (welcome new blog subscribers, btw). I mentioned a quote that means a lot to me, although I have not been able to find the correct attribution for it: “The truth doesn’t change, only our perception of it does.” The truth is the truth is the truth. Like absolute zero in Algebra (the concept that almost did me in during my High School Algebra class until I realized I was making it way too hard), the truth is and always will be. Can we grasp the idea that perhaps we have some faulty thinking? That there is a possibility that the truth as we see it is just that? The truth as we see it. We flavor the truth with emotions, perceptions, moods, memories and preconceived notions. What would the truth look like if we took away those things?

I will be attending a reunion of sorts in the fall. It will be for the school I attended before high school, having moved across country with my family at the very tender age of 15. Although I don’t remember a lot of the people I will be seeing I have very strong memories where an emotion is attached. Memories of fun, laughter, sadness and even rejection. Memories of being made fun of and even bullied. Memories of good friends who stuck by my side as strongly as I stuck by theirs. What if I examine the truth of what I think my reality was during those years? The truth is, I have no clue about the past lives, thoughts and beliefs of any of my classmates. The truth is, when someone from the “in” crowd made a snide comment it had little to do with me or how I measured up (or down) in their estimation. The truth is that snide comment said a lot more about the giver’s character and troubles than my own. Of course, I didn’t understand that in Junior High. Today I can examine more closely a truth about who I am, a truth that has nothing to do with what others might think about me and a truth that is being revealed as insecurities and doubts are stripped away.

How do we do that? While it is certainly not true that I am becoming more perfect (haha) – that just makes me laugh – it is true that I used that one little word…repeat. I began to watch my language and then change my language. By noticing the words and thoughts that we repeat we can begin to get a clue about how our lives will turn and eventually turn out. I shudder to think what my life would be like today if I had continued to repeat words like stupid and clumsy and thoughts like why bother or I’ll never learn.

What words (and thoughts) do you repeat? Out loud or silently? Can you see how those words drive the direction of the spiral of your life? We think our lives line up in a straight line from beginning to end. The reality is our lives loop and spiral – over, around, up and down – as they march from beginning to end. That vision tends to make me think it is an easier thing to make changes. I would never have the energy to completely change the entire direction of my life. But I can easily make the tiny changes needed to reverse the direction of my current spiral from downward to upward. How? By that one little word – repeat.

This week think about and notice words you think or say often. Think about how changing the direction of that thought could improve the direction of your life. Then follow the instructions on the shampoo bottle – repeat.

Change your thought.  Add a new word to your vocabulary and change the picture of your future.

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8

“Thoughts are like arrows: once released, they strike their mark. Guard them well or one day you may be your own victim.” Navajo saying

Two little letters

“I wish I had enough money to buy an elephant,” the old joke goes. “Why would you want to buy an elephant?” “Oh, I don’t want an elephant, I just want the money it would take to buy one.”

I wish…, I want…, why can’t I…, all mean the same thing – there is something missing in my life. Unless we have reached that perfection that so many of us strive for everyday, we all are missing something. This blog is about how making a tiny shift in our attitude about what is missing can have a huge impact on our perception of what is present. Adjust our in-look to improve our outlook.

Today marks the end of the first week of ELAN Course Five, “Practice the Abundance Mentality” for the current class. All week we have been challenged to recognize blessings in our lives. It is a simple assignment, one that gets easier as the week goes on. Recognize the moments when you are moved to give pause and give thanks. Recognize the things that you have in abundance. This “Observation Exercise” doesn’t really take any time but it adjusts our focus and piques our interest concerning one aspect of our lives. It is based on a common ELAN Blog theme -what we focus on expands.

This past week I have been focusing on what I do have. The list is so long I couldn’t possibly begin to include it here. The observation has revealed an unlimited abundance of nature, beauty, health, friends, family, nourishment, enjoyment, frivolity, humor, love, appreciation and on and on. Here is the amazing part of this simple exercise – in so doing, I have completely lost sight of what I don’t have in my life. As I look back on this last week I have a feeling of overflowing goodness; I see a bounty of beauty; I realize there is abundance in “God’s rich supply.” Here is the flip side – I have come face to face with the fact that I don’t need a thing. I do need to do the work to treat what I do have with love and respect and to make sure I continue to have needs provided for, but realizing that lack is missing in my life helps me recognize that abundance is very present. This has nothing to do with the size of my house, the balance in my bank account or the newness of my car. It is not about comparing my list of goods with another’s. One of us will always come up short in comparisons. It is about paying attention to blessings we do have instead of focusing on what we don’t have. Two little letters (and an apostrophe) can have an impact on your outlook. Switch your focus from “I don’t” to “I do” and see what happens.

“I don’t like my job.” “I do have a job.”

“I don’t like the way I look.” “I do love and honor my body.”

“I don’t feel loving toward my partner.” “I do appreciate him (her).”

“I don’t have a shiny new car.” “I do have a car that is dependable and gets me where I am going.”

“I don’t have much energy today.” “I do have strong muscles that do what I ask them to all day long.”

“I don’t live near my kids and grandkids.” “I do have today’s technology that allows me to see them and talk to them regularly.”

“I don’t have an elephant.” “I do have a framed, fine silk scarf with an image of an elephant to remind me of what I do have.”

This week, pay attention to what you focus on. Does that thing or aspect of your life fall into the DO or DON’T category?

DON’T                                                                                                         DO

Scarcity                                                                                                        Abundance

Fear                                                                                                              Faith

War                                                                                                              Peace

Hate                                                                                                             Love

Illness                                                                                                         Health

Destruction                                                                                                Beauty

Falsehoods                                                                                                 Truth

If it is true that what we focus on expands, why would we choose to focus on fear, lack, scarcity, destruction and illness? What would happen in your world if you adjusted your focus? How can you take a small step to recognize and give thanks for what you do have today?

“And the Lord God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground – trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food.” Genesis 2:9a

“There is no fear where there is faith.”  Kiowa saying

BTW, the photo above was taken at the French Quarter Market in New Orleans a few years ago. I chose to focus on the beauty of bounty displayed at the vendor’s produce booth. That beauty and bounty has now informed my memory of that day, regardless of whatever else may have been going on around or within.

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Goodness Gracious!

A belated Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there – I hope you were able to spend a few moments with your children and loved ones and may you feel loved every day. I certainly love all the moms in my life and was blessed to be able to spend a little bit of time with my own MOM-in-law who is a wonderful example of love and care for everyone in her life. We made our annual trek to New Orleans for Jazz Fest this past weekend – what a perfect way to celebrate.

This year the weather was wonderful and since this is an outdoor event, that was a huge blessing. Sunny skies made for large crowds which translated into more opportunities to people-watch. Listening in on conversations (many in that recognizable New Orleans accent), watching old friends meet up and seeing new friendships being formed was entertainment enough, but add to that really good music at every turn and you can’t ask for a better day. My favorite way to experience Jazz Fest (which by the way is an understatement – of the 16 stages only one is dedicated to jazz music) is to walk around the grounds and stop and sample new music. I  make the rounds several times before settling in my folding canvass chair left at our base camp set up at one of the large outdoor stages.

They say that having a common enemy brings people together. That may be true, but I challenge you to shift your thinking just a bit today. I believe a common love brings people together – “Come on people now, everybody get together and love one another right now, right now…”. Imagine shifting from marching shoulder to shoulder in battle to standing hand in hand in love. I am not sure what the common bond is among Jazz Fest attendees but it is a love fest. Love of music? Love of outdoor events? Love of New Orleans? We know the power of thought – a tiny shift in our own thinking begins an avalanche of thoughts that shift our attitude and then behavior. The good news is we have the power to choose that initial thought. We can choose if that avalanche will be like a torrent of rocks pelting us or a refreshing rain of renewing feelings of love, peace and happiness. Music has power to change or direct our thoughts. On the Gentilly stage Friday afternoon, Buckwheat Zydeco covered a Bob Marley song, “Peace, Love and Happiness.” Imagine standing on a grassy slope with thousands of your newfound friends singing along in the sunshine…Peace, Love and Happiness. As the day wore on our staked-out spots became less and less defined and our music-loving neighbors moved closer and closer until it was difficult to navigate your way out of the crowd. Once you settled in you made a commitment to stay for the duration. No such thing as a quick run to the porta-potties. Even the beer and peanut hawkers had trouble delivering their wares to the thirsty and hungry revelers.

And this is the point I want to make – people are good. People are gracious. Thousands of strangers crowded together and yet courtesy and smiles were extended as money would pass one way while the purchased goods passed the other. Brave souls who made their way through the wave of people were met with offers to move out of the way or suggestions for the best way out (or in). Walking around the grounds, standing in lines at the bathrooms or food vendors and conversing with the artisans manning their booths were all pleasant, even joyful, experiences.

We allow negative images and thoughts to crowd our brains until we believe that the world is filled with evil and destruction. I do not deny that those exist. Nor do I buy the notion that such things are new. We have night and we have day. We have darkness and we have light. Darkness cannot overcome light. There is no such thing as a flashdark. Think about that. For whatever reason, there are those who try to darken the world with their behaviors, thoughts and actions. They can only succeed if we choose to dim our own inner light born of peace, love and happiness.

This week I have a special challenge to offer you. Turn off the negative images, voices and conversations that permeate our world. Don’t watch or listen to the news. I have news for you. You will survive without it. The world will continue without your input. Inform your own world with images of peace, love and happiness. Focus on the goodness in your own world. If you have time, take a camera (or your smartphone) out during your lunch hour or coffee break and look for beauty. Focus on the goodness of others. Watch what happens. Try it for one day or one week and see how good and gracious people in your world really are. Pick a song that lifts you up and play it just for you. Shine your own light to those you love and especially those you don’t. Goodness gracious!

“Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.” Matthew 5:15

“When the Power of Love overcomes the Love of Power the world will know peace.” Anonymous, inscribed on a soldier’s cigarette lighter

Celebrate?

Celebrate, what? Freedom? Independence? Peace? I was listening to the news on NPR this morning and heard about the capture and killing of Osama Bin Laden. The coverage included news stories of celebrations around this country – masses congregating at the World Trade Center location in New York and others in Washington, D.C., people honking and cheering. Was anyone else horrified by the fact that our current means of celebrating our patriotism to our country is to party at the expense of a human life? I know, this is a radical thought. You can share all the facts and history regarding the importance of this military mission and its success. But still, we are reducing our allegiance to this country to symbols.

We say we want peace. We say we respect the flag. We say we fight for freedom and will pay any price for it. We say we are an independent people living in an independent nation. Yes, Bin Laden is one of many tyrants that hold too much power in our world today – so much so that no one or no thing can stop them from doing whatever they please, at the expense of the lives or freedom of millions. He remains a symbol of the enemy. Eradicating one does not lessen the likelihood of another quickly following. We say we want peace and yet this country is built on a foundation of war. From our beginning there has been a common enemy to fight. Today, we blindly fight within our own borders. We have a war against poverty, a war against drugs, a war against terror, a war against illiteracy, a war against obesity. You name it, we fight it. The biggest war and the largest threat that faces us today is the one we allow to continue – the war between the leaders of our country. As long as we continue to vote for, support and join in the battles with our elected officials – who refuse to work together for the greater good and instead spend undue time, money and energy tearing the other camp down, we will continue to be a failing nation. A nation that is falling behind our previous enemies on the global plain. Even in my little burb, we have an election for mayor. I am happy that we have two candidates for the position. This country is built on the democratic process and this is an example of that at the most basic level. Unfortunately this small election is not without negative barbs, flying emails and opinion pieces posted to malign one candidate or another. I am hopeful that regardless of the outcome of the election (both candidates are capable of doing a good job as our mayor), the two will continue to work together for the good of our community. I choose to vote for the candidate who has refrained from negative campaign tactics.

We say we want peace. If we strive for peace we must strive for peace in our own homes – seek understanding among ourselves. We must shift our thinking from one of war and attack to one of peace and cooperation. When I see evidence of the leaders of our country putting aside trivial bickering about who is responsible for what, which party is more socialist, communist, centrist, big-government, grass-roots, liberal, conservative or radical and work together to create a world-class education system that raises up geniuses in their fields and thinking leaders of the future; when I see a country that honors the values of hard work, education, servant-driven leadership and those that teach us instead of those who show us how to fight, whether on the playing field or the floor of congress; when I see a country that welcomes all people to her land, regardless of religious, political, sexual or ethnic categories – then I will be waving a flag as a proud symbol of all we are meant to be – of what our founders envisioned for this country.

I am not giving up hope. I believe that we can be a world leader in education. I believe we can be a role model of leadership. I have faith that we can embrace a peaceful co-existence with our co-countries that share this increasingly crowded space.

I seek peace within my home. I honor the flag as a symbol of the values of what this country was founded on. I am very thankful for the freedom I enjoy every day – but, I recognize when that freedom is eroded, bit by bit, one law at a time in an effort to hold tightly to the myth of security. I do my best to remain an independent person even though I know I live in a country that may not survive one day without the resources of other countries. I recognize I am a consumer of foreign oil and other resources but I can adapt practices to decrease my personal dependence. I can choose daily lifestyle choices that enable me to continue to be independent of federal or state aid.

Today, I choose to stand for something rather than fight against something. I choose to stand for peace within my own small world. That means to not join in a celebration over someone’s death, regardless of who that someone is. I believe the civility of a people can be measured by how they react to the loss of life, no matter whose life. I believe the people of this country are more civil than what the news media choose to portray.

How about you? What do you stand for? Make a small shift in your words – choose “for” above “against” and see if it makes a difference in your world.

“Do not allow anger to poison you.” Hopi saying

“…the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:26

Easter Sunday

“On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus.” Luke 24:1,2

ELAN Lent Series, Day Forty: Move Forth and Carry On

It is finally here – Day 40 of the ELAN Blog Lent series. I must say I will be somewhat sad to see it go. As mentioned previously, this effort was in response to a practice begun a few years ago to Take something up, instead of Give something up during the Lent season and it has been an exercise of personal discipline. Since it has stretched on for more than six weeks, it is now a habit for me to do this one small task first thing (after coffee and journaling). What will fill this time from here on out? That is the beauty of challenging yourself with a new discipline – with dedicated and intentional focus, that thing becomes a habit until it flavors your day automatically. I am now at the bottom of the learning curve, having slid down the second half. That means I am actively looking for a new one to begin to climb. Rather than a concern or a worry, the thought of a new something to learn or improve on is exciting. There are unlimited possibilities.

We finish this long Lent- short series on being a life-long learner with encouragement that whatever field or skill you choose to challenge yourself with will flow easily if you focus intentionally on that one skill for just a few minutes a day – especially when that one thing fits well with your personal and unique talent. This is where any excuses must be thrown out the window. Too old? Nonsense! “Your brain is much better than you think,” says Michael J.Gelb, in How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci. He encourages us that our brains actually improve with age – if used properly. He tells us our “neural endowment”  is so great that even losing 1,000 brain cells a day every day would only amount to less than one percent of the total over the course of our lives. No matter your age or your lowly opinion of your own mental ability, there is great room for improvement. Try that new truth on for size. How does it feel to imagine that you are capable of learning new things? If that new thing floats your personal boat, all the better. You can find moments of flow, lost in an activity that jives with your mojo so well that you lose track of time. In the flow, you lose concern about what others think or how long it might take you to get where you are going. The doing is the destination. When you are in the flow of learning a new task, especially when you are at the crest of the learning curve, the time to arrive is now and the place to be is here. Back to the sledding analogy – the goal is the ride, not the abrupt stop at level ground.

Gelb tells us that although we may not become equal to the number one genius of all time, we could adopt some of his practices to enrich our lives. He asks readers to use his book as a guidebook, “An invitation to breathe the vivid air, to feel the fire in your heart’s centre, and the full flowering of your spirit.”

Today (and tomorrow), think about what new thing you could learn that would fit well with your authentic self. Feel free to return to these blogs at any time to refresh your thoughts about what that means. My hope is that you will be encouraged to observe your world on a daily basis and think about how you can become more effective in that world. May you continue on a personal development journey in pursuit of living a 3-D life – by Discovering, Developing and Delivering your Passive Passion turned to Action to your world, large and small.

“With Leonardo as your inspiration, you will make your life a work of art.” Michael J. Gelb, How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci

“Let the wise listen and add to their learning…” Proverbs 1:5a

ELAN Lent Series, Day Thirty-nine: Be a Life-long Learner 3

So far in this short series we have talked about refreshing our brains in order to get into the flow when learning and practicing new skills. Today we talk about creating a personal reality that is based on truth in order to recover our authentic selves. This will prepare us for tomorrow’s blog – the last of this Lent series – and the last of this short series on life-long learning. Returning to truth is a way of becoming authentic. It is a way to uncover your own unique skills and abilities. When we approach learning through the lens of what truly, deeply matters to us personally, we tap into the Divine plan for the highest and best use of those skills and abilities to serve God by serving others. Imagine looking forward to four years of college or other other higher-ed institution and knowing beyond a doubt which subject you should be working so hard to learn. I may be wrong in this statement, but it seems to me that many of us had no clue at that time and so we bought the lies of others to determine our path. That is not to say others intentionally lied to us, but it is to say that because we did not spend personal reflection time discovering our passive passion we were ships with sails set to whatever wind was blowing upon our personal sea of reality.

“The truth is the real you; it’s your integrity,” Don Miquel Ruiz says in The Voice of Knowledge. “Nobody can guide you to that place. Only you can take yourself there.” How? By tapping into your own abilities, cares and concerns. Ruiz reminds us that we live in a reality that we created based on our own story, but we have the power to change that story. “You can transform yourself from a messenger of lies, fear, and destruction to a messenger of truth, love and creation. When you return to the truth, the way you express yourself in society is much better. Your communication improves.” He adds that doing so will improve your life in all directions. He reminds us that we can’t change the world, or even need to, but we can change ourselves by first knowing ourselves. That is a big step. “When you uncover the truth, your truth, a miracle happens,” Ruiz says, adding the truth is a place of love and joy.

Today is Good Friday. Christians celebrate this most important season as a time of new birth, new creation. It is spring time – new and colorful buds are peeping through the fresh dirt laid so carefully in the flower beds. Baby chicks are peeping, too – even if only of the marshmallow variety found in so many colors today. It is a time to celebrate God’s creations and a time to celebrate the new creation in us as we respond to God’s sacrifice of His son and Jesus’ supreme act of love. The truth is God loves us unconditionally, in spite of our failings. The truth is, God has gifted us each with talents that no other of the seven plus billion people possess in exactly the same way. The truth is, we can best honor God by discovering our true and authentic selves and then joyfully sharing our gifts with others.

Today, think about the creation of you. Think about your own truth, as seen through the eyes of your loving God. “When you believe the truth, the result is happiness, love, goodness,” Ruiz says. Think about how you can apply your truth, your place of love and joy, to a new skill or field of knowledge. Think about how you can Discover and Develop the tools to Deliver your Passive Passion turned to Action to your world, large or small.

“You cannot share lies and share truth at the same time.” Don Miquel Ruiz, The Voice of Knowledge

“But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.” John 3:21

ELAN Lent Series, Day Thirty-eight: Be a Life-long Learner 2

Yesterday we talked about the importance of being a life-long learner. Personally, I love to enter the front side of a learning curve. It is daunting to view the goal from the lowly first step at the bottom of that hill, but it can be strengthening and exhilarating to visualize success with each steep step. As we gain skill and confidence -in whatever field we are pursuing – those steps level off until we can relax and enjoy our newfound ability. Whether we set small, daily and easily attainable goals to push us through or just trudge along with our eyes and minds focused on the crest, reaching the top of the curve is exciting. The gliding, sliding, downward phase can be like that of sledding after a long climb up the hill. Whee!

Today we focuse on refreshing our brain. This morning my email was acting up, slow to respond to clicks to open and reply to a message. Doing the favorite fallback procedure of shutting it down and rebooting the machine did the trick. Sometimes we just need to stop, shut down mentally, rest and prepare for an attitudinal reboot. Daniel G. Amen, M.D., in Change Your Brain, Change Your Life, says our thoughts have physical properties as they send electrical signals to our brains. He discusses his use of SPECT (single photon emission computed tomography) studies on clients to determine the best method of treatment for them, but we can benefit from his findings without making an appointment with him for such a scan. Through his decades of study, Amen has been able to pinpoint over- or under-active areas of the brain as they correlate to specific behavioral problems. For example, if the cingulate area is overactive (found in the frontal lobe), that person would get stuck in thought spirals. Since the brain is the seat of feelings and behaviors, Amen makes a radical statement about ordinary thinking, “Your brain creates your world.” He gives examples of how the evolution of the human brain has given us the capacity for planning, organization, problem solving and rational thought. “Yet in order for these functions to have an effect in the world,” he says, “one must have passion, emotion, and the desire to make something happen.” He adds the deep limbic system (a small, power-packed system near the center of the brain) is where that passion and emotion originates. “The deep limbic system is the emotional spice, if you will, in both positive and negative ways…(it) is the filter through which you interpret the events of the day.”

Do you get that shift in thinking? The events of the day do not happen to you. The events of the day happen. You have a filter that determines your reaction to those events. Wouldn’t it be amazing if you had the power to change how you filter? Is it possible that you do? Amen cautions against allowing ANTs to take over your brain – automatic negative thoughts – because they become self-fulfilling. As Amen says, “…you don’t expect good things to happen, so you don’t try very hard to make them happen.” He encourages us that changing the filter from a negative one to a positive one can have a huge impact on the outcome of our day.  What does all this have to do with being a life-long learner? Think about the class you dreaded most in high school. How well did you do in that class? How easy was it for you to read, study and learn that subject? Compare that to your favorite class. We choose to set negative expectations on our ability to learn. We can change those expectations. “On the other hand, positive thoughts and a positive attitude will help you radiate a sense of well-being, making it easier for others to connect with you,” Amen says. “Positive thoughts will also help you be more effective in your life.”

Today, think about the filter you use to interpret events of the day. Think about some new skill or field of knowledge you would like to pursue. Think about how a small shift from a negative filter to a positive one could affect your experience on that learning curve. Think about how that could change your world, large or small.

“Teaching yourself to control and direct thoughts in a positive way is one of the most effective ways to feel better.” Daniel G. Amen, Change Your Brain, Change Your Life

“You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.” Psalm 30:11

ELAN Lent Series, Day Thirty-seven: Be a Life-long Learner 1

Today we begin the short series on the importance of being a life-long learner. This series will complete this ELAN Lenten series that has been my privilege, pleasure and challenge to write. Thank you for joining me in this discipline. I want to share some background behind this series as we wrap it up. The ELAN Curriculum will be ten, four-week courses when complete and so it fit perfectly for this 40 day endeavor, one week of the curriculum briefly touched on each day. Some of you who are familiar with the ELAN courses know that I have been working this year to expand the original 10-week class into these four-week courses, one for each of the Ten ELAN Principles. You also know that I have completed courses One through Five.  Up until the twentieth day of this ELAN Blog short series, there has been material to draw from for these blogs. After that, I have written from thought, based on an idea I have of how this will all come together. Thirty-seven plus days ago I made an outline of the forty days and grabbed books I thought would relate well to the topic of the day. I am saying all those many words in order to illustrate a point. The words that I will share with you today come from Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. I am struck by the “coincidence” of his ideas flowing perfectly on to the thoughts expressed earlier in this series. As mentioned before, I am encouraged that each day and week of this now nearly finished series fit so well together. Had I used logic and worked hard to do so, I would have failed. I recognize that I am merely the instrument that chose to take on this challenge and I am thankful that my Higher Power (refer to days One through Four) has directed the steps involved to create the finished product. Such moments carry me through a challenge. I hope that you, too, are involved in some project, cause or endeavor that makes you feel the same.

“In reviewing the conditions that help establish order in the mind,” Csikszentmihalyi says, “we shall first look at the extremely important role of memory, then at how words can be used to produce flow experiences.” He continues that doing activities that create order in our mind is an important step in experiencing flow – that period of time when you are so engrossed in an activity, one that matches perfectly to your skills and abilities, that you lose sense of time. To repeat a common theme on this blog site, we must be intentional about seeking these moments through discovering and developing our own unique skill set and then delivering that Passive Passion turned to Action to our world, large or small.

“But when we are left alone, with no demands on attention, the basic disorder of the mind reveals itself,” he says. “With nothing to do, it begins to follow random patterns, usually stopping to consider something painful or disturbing…Entropy is the normal state of consciousness – a condition that is neither useful nor enjoyable.”

I don’t know about you, but I would like to prevent entropy of my mind. How do we do that? We engage in some type of mental activity on a daily basis. Beyond crossword puzzles and Sudoku, we strive to learn and improve our mental state. We jump on a new learning curve. We take on a new intellectual challenge. We practice the habit of being a life-long learner.

Today, think about a mental challenge you would like to pursue. What new topic would you like to learn about? What new skill would you like to acquire? How can you incorporate a few minutes a day into your hectic schedule to honor that desire? How would those few daily minutes add up to a wealth of knowledge tomorrow?

“The best moments usually occur when a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.” Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

“I applied my heart to what I observed and learned a lesson from what I saw.” Proverbs 24:32